DIARY - Friday 8th February 2008 There are a few sore heads today and I have an upset stomach and all that goes with it. We leave after another feast of which I eat absolutely nothing and the family seem sorry to see me go. The daughter who has been practising her English on me for the last 2 days passes on my thanks. They are a wonderful family and they have shown me such hospitality I was glad I took the trouble to buy the special Tet present (a food hamper) and give the traditional gifts of the money in envelopes. (I was given one from them too) The ride to the next homestay is a little fraught on the roads, with drunk riders of motorcycles, three and four to a bike hairing around corners, overtaking on blind bends and generally having a ball. Accident rates will be high today, if there were any hospitals around here I bet they would be full!
The home stay for the night is one that I found accidentally on my first foray to the north east. It was a bit on the scruffy side then, the food leaving a lot to be desired and things have not changed. However the welcome is friendly and as my upset stomach is progressing nicely thank you very much at least it gives me an excuse not to eat more than an orange. Tang explains to me that the man of the house is a tribal chief and the spiritual leader for the area. He has a very important position, at the moment it is horizontal as are most of his buddies. This Tet holiday is okay but excessive eating and drinking is the norm - heaven help their livers!
The events that happened next sit uncomfortably in my mind, almost frighten me, so I am writing them down to perhaps, exercise the ghosts. Three of the men in the house are from outlying villages, come home to celebrate with the family. They are all very drunk. One of them from high up in the mountains has never seen a European woman before and he takes a fancy to me. He wants to touch my skin, chat to me, though he is spitting and slavering and I try hard to hide my revulsion. He is every woman's nightmare, a creep with lecherous thoughts coming out of his very being. For the first time in my life I feel under threat. 'Face' is everything to the Vietnamese so I edge away and pretend I don't understand his intentions. I ignore him and begin to talk to my guide. This country bum (and that is not racist or sexist!) decides to show bravado and grabs the sacred text book and opens it. Now this is a big taboo. If you open the text book it would seem, unless you can memorise everything on the page in one sitting, you have offended the spiritual leader, who has the book in his keeping. The penalty is that a chicken must be provided by the offender this is then sacrificed, plucked, cooked and eaten. Now my drunk lecher is being a pest and I leave the room and shout to Tang to come outside. I tell him in no uncertain terms I am not happy with the way things are going and unless the man is sorted, I will get on the bike and ride off to somewhere safe. This causes deep embarrassment to the tribal chief and while I cower in the women's quarters the man is despatched out of the village. Within the hour the man's elder brother comes to our hut profuse with his apologies. I feel like shit, spoiling the party for them but uneasy for my own safety. The drinking continues and the penalty of the sacrificial chicken is brought up. Keeping in mind I have had absolutely no alcohol, my mind is crystal clear, things take on the aspect of a nightmare. Villagers come into the hut, somebody has brought drums and they start to beat rhythmically; the singing and dancing begin and the chicken is brought, panic in every squawk while it is paraded round the room before it's life is ended most horrifically. All the time the two young daughters sit in the corner watching satellite TV totally untouched by this performance. Bizarre. 'You should go to bed now' Tang tells me, which has little comfort when everybody lives and sleeps in the same room but I take his advice and hide behind the curtain that is my bit of bedroom. The noise is deafening, the laugher manic, I plug in my MD player, turn the volume up and the Travelling Wilburys block out the mayhem that ensues. I don't sleep at all and the next morning I can't wait to leave this house. Tet has its downside, the excessive drinking, the cruelty, the rawness of the life. All of a sudden I just want to be at home. What a wimp - failure again.